Can YOU Just Say No?

They triumphed over him (the enemy) by the blood of the Lamb 

and by the word of their testimony.

Revelation 12:11

Saying it's easy to stop drinking alcohol for an alcoholic or to stop doing drugs for a drug addict is like saying it's easy to stop drinking coke and coffee or to put down the donuts forever.

Ungodly addictions are counterproductive. Instead of helping the person adapt to situations or overcome problems, it tends to undermine these abilities.

For example, a gambler might wish he had more money - yet gambling is more likely to drain his financial resources. A heavy drinker might want to cheer herself up - yet alcohol use contributes to the development of her depression. A sex addict may crave intimacy - yet the focus on sexual acts may prevent real closeness from developing. When someone is addicted, they will continue to engage in the addictive behavior, despite it causing them trouble.

I was what they call ‘a functioning drunk and drug addict’. I thought I didn’t have a drinking or drug problem because, despite drinking from the time I got up in the morning till the time I went to bed at night, popping pills, smoking weed laced with other drugs, and smoking two packs of cigarettes a day, I thought I was ok because I otherwise held a ‘normal’ life holding a good job and appearing to be ok. I’d go out every single night and get up and go to work every single morning. I had drank and done drugs for as long as I can remember. It started early in my school years. There used to be a 7-eleven by my old school and I’d go by a bottle of wine or beer or something like that and a can sprite or coke, down what I could of the alcohol and pour the rest in the can and bring it right into the classroom with me and I’d slide it in my desk when I wasn't gulping it away. Chewing a lot of gum helped disguise the smell. Harmless, huh? Nope. It led to a more and more destructive lifestyle as the years went on. Why do it? Probably because I was subconsciously trying to numb the pain of the child inside me that had been hurt over and over and had no one to share or go to (in part cause as a child my parents were a big part of the problem) and from shame and guilt. The traumatic events that have happened to me and around me over the course of the years just seemed to 'cement' my love for alcohol and drugs. I hid things pretty well from those who loved me, didn't let anyone see everything I was doing. I didn't feel safe sharing my secrets with anyone. The addictions were my escape and my crutch, though they failed me miserably.

A lot of people portray addicts as hopeless, unhappy people whose lives are falling apart. Many people with addictions do not believe they are addicted as long as they are enjoying themselves, and they are holding their lives together. I personally LOVED the lifestyle and couldn’t get enough. I couldn't see all the harm it was causing in the beginning, either that or I did and just didn't care. Had it not been for Jesus, I’d still be doing the same thing now, because at the time it was so hard for me to lay those things down and I fought laying them down tooth and nail.

Near death combinations of drugs and alcohol has taken a toll on my health. That's definitely been a factor in stopping the old lifestyle. It's really not all it's cracked up to be. It's really not that glamorous. In an effort to help me stop traveling the road of destruction I was on, the Lord slowly began taking away desires of the lifestyle I had. There'd be times I'd try so hard to get high or a buzz and couldn't. I'd start feeling empty when I would be out, like it was amplified that there was a hole in me that needed to be filled a different way (with Him). I experienced hangovers and migraines from the alcohol. I developed asthma from long term chemical exposure at a state job I had, dumb me would still try to smoke when I couldn't even breath. I'd mix so many drugs and alcohol, and oh yes, the doctors said anti-depressants would fix everything so I was taking them all at the same time. There were times I'd pass out at the wheel, times I wouldn't know the function to eat or go to the bathroom, or I'd be hungry and know I was supposed to eat, but would forget how to eat, how to even hold a fork. All these things that were 'supposed' to help weren't making things better.

My dad’s an alcoholic. Still. After all these years, he thinks he’s ok and not drinking too much. Ok, whatever. They say the genes that can predispose you to things like alcoholism and other addictions can be passed down. I don’t know if that's true or whether I got anything like that from him or not, but I do know that even if I did I still can make a choice to do better, seek help, and say no.

You know, the lure of the things of the world can be so very strong and seducing. It’ll just suck you right up in there if you let it. Before you even know what's happening. We have to get to a point where we make a decision, whether we want to take a stand, do the right thing, and just say no. We have a choice to make, and the one we make affects those around us, not just us. Choose carefully.

Things aren't always as easy as you think they'd be. If you haven't been there, how would you know? It takes lots of Christ's love and grace to say no to some things of this world. People need those who love and support to walk along side of them, judgers DO NOT aid in the healing process.



God wouldn't ask us to do something (like staying sober and being watchful) without empowering us to accomplish it. Each step of obedience that we take is a victory. Pain is nothing compared to what it feels like to quit.

Let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be awake and sober. 1 Thessalonians 5:6

When I first got saved, the Lord lead me to read Romans 8 every day for a month. I still read it every chance I get. It touches on so many aspects and the Lord has brought me so much healing through it. It tells us there's no condemnation (no guilt) if we're in Christ, that we are accepted by Him and God is our Father and how much God loves us and that we can NEVER be separated from His love.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: ‘For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’ No, in all these things we are MORE THAN CONQUERORS through him who loved us. Romans 8:35-37

Paul said in the Word, I die daily. And that’s what I’ve had to do in my walk to be a better person and please the Lord, say no to the flesh daily, and when I fail (which is all too often) repent and keep stepping (instead of receiving guilt and going back to old ways.). Some days are better than other days. Some days I just plain blow it. Thank God for a loving Father who forgives when I come to Him in repentance, who loves ME not my ACTIONS, and who’s always there for me. I’ll never have to walk this road alone, and neither will you if you ask for help. God’s love has helped win me out. If you stay in God’s presence long enough, you can’t help but change. The more of Him we have in us, the less room for the things of this world. We’re works in progress.

Am I totally fixed, cured? Of course not. But I’m a long ways down the road closer to being whole in Christ than I used to be. I’m a work in progress. I’m on my way.

Things may look bleak, but rest assured that your hope and trust in Jesus as your great escape GUARANTEES you a way out. For whatever you're going thru know that JESUS is aware, HE understands and HE's somehow gonna help you.

Drinking, doing drugs, smoking ARE NOT the way to fit in or make friends. If you have people in your life trying to force you to do those things, get away from them. You don't need those things and you don't need the people. Don't give in to peer pressure.

DO NOT think that being a Christian makes you immune to struggles like those I have described here. What being a Christian DOES DO is give us a helper and teacher, the Holy Spirit.

Submit your life to the Lord. Ask Him for deliverance from what has you bound. Cooperate with the Holy Spirit. Trust. Relinquish control of your life, your emotions, your actions and feelings to the Lord. Ungodly addictions WILL NOT fix you or your situation. Stop reaching for the wrong things to help you. Don't be discouraged by set backs. Forming new habits to replace old ones takes time.

And just say … no.

Father God, help us to make right choices. Take away the desire for ungodly addictions from us. Fill the voids. Heal our hearts and love on us. Help us to stand strong. Send godly people in our lives who can make the road to wholeness a little easier. In Jesus' name, amen.

Believing for a Loved One?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3,4




The Lord has really been good to me, I AM so grateful that He spared me from the road I was traveling on. God's no respecter of persons. What He did for me, He CAN do for your loved ones.

The best advice that I can give is to not grow weary. Do what you know to do (pray and be supportive). What's left after having done all is to STAND. The Lord is loving and cares for our loved ones deeply, and He knows just how to reach each one. The Lord's gonna be patient and wait for them to come to Him for help, just like we all have to. We all have to get to that point of desperation. I know that our heavenly Father is pleased with us, sees and feels our heart, and will answer our prayers in His timing. We can't rush the work of the Father.

Our loved ones are really blessed to have people like us in their life, who loves them and hasn't given up, even if everyone else has. We're doing right when we aren't judging or rejecting them... just loving them ... LOVE WINS ONE OUT.

LOVE WON ME OUT.

Prayer: Father God, I pray that You woo our loved ones by way of the Holy Spirit. Draw them to You. Love on them. Be there for them. Help them to call out for You, for You have never rejected those who seek Your face. Minister to them, love the hurts and pains of the past away, take away ungodly addictions, help them to live for You. Keep them safe from all harm and be gentle with them as You work to reach them. Help us to know our part, be loving and supportive (but not enabler of ungodly actions or addictions) and give us peace and renew our hope as we wait on You to move ... suddenly. In Jesus' name, amen.

Thanks, Mom

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne?Though she may forget, I will not forget you (says the Lord). Isaiah 49:16

Have a child who hasn’t surrendered their life to the Lord or have you not seen or talked to them in awhile? There were SO many years that I said no to my mom about going to church and a few years that I didn't talk to her at all, because I was hiding in my shame living my life the way I wanted and because of the way she used to treat me. But now, I with honor serve the Lord with gladness, and I see my mom so much she's probably getting tired of me (I learned to forgive her by realizing that though she messed up a LOT, I believe that she really did do the best she knew how). If you’re wondering if your child will ever come to the Lord or if your relationship with your child will ever be repaired, find hope in one prodigal (me) that found her way back. Be encouraged, God's not finished ... He's the Repairer of the breach … His arm IS NOT shortened that it can’t reach into your circumstance and bring healing, no matter how long the hurt and pain has been there.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we don’t give up. Galations 6:9

Has your mother passed away, left you, or don’t want to see you? Our loving, heavenly Father will never leave us, reject us, or stop loving us.

You've always been right there for me Lord; don't turn Your back on me now. Don't throw me out, don't abandon me; You've always kept the door open. My father and mother walked out and left me, but God took me in (adopted me as His child). Psalm 27:9,10

You may know someone who appears to have no children. Please be sensitive. There are many mothers whose children are in heaven already, due to miscarriage, illness, abortion, etc.

Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you;I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaah 46:4



This is a picture of my mom from last week (we're holding hands). My mom’s getting older, doesn’t get around as well as she used to, and doesn’t remember a lot. But she’s my mom. And I’m grateful for her. I so thank God for her. For a godly heritage. For not giving up on me. For praying for me. For loving me, though we don’t see eye to eye on so many things, she still tries to be there for me. Sometimes I think she’s still trying to make up for all the lost years we had … her for the way she treated me, and me for shutting her out of my life for so long. I forgive you, mama. I forgive you. From the bottom of my heart. I release you from having to make up for everything. I’m so sorry for all the years I disrespected you and tried to (subconsciously) make you pay for the past. Forgive me. I love you mama, Happy Mother’s Day.   

Mother/daughter relationship issues? Open your heart to anything God might want to do to heal the broken places. Jesus came to set the captives free - but we have to ask Him and be willing to receive the healing. Ask the Lord to teach you to love your mother in spite of rejection and troubles. No matter how much it hurts to come face to face with our own failings, God wants to reveal them so He can replace our weakness with His strength.

Pick up the phone, send a card, pay a visit … love on your mother NOW, you never know how long you’ll have her around.

Father, love on mothers, and all those acting in a mother capacity today. Bless them, mend relationships. For those who are without, bring comfort. Fill the voids.  I pray for unity, peace, healing, and salvation in families  Help us to be a blessing to our moms, like they have tried to be for us. May we always treat them with the respect and love that they’re due. In Jesus’ name, amen.

The Unpardonable Sin

The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9




If you're worried you committed the unpardonable sin (rejection of Christ forever) you probably haven't, if you had you wouldn't care.

Hearing the thought in my head that I'd committed the unpardonable sin kept me from seeking Jesus FOR YEARS, stupid devil. I still remember when I first heard the lie. I was about seven, and I was sitting in the back seat of my parents station wagon. It was night time. I heard the lie in my head so loud that I'd committed the unpardonable sin that I could have sworn that everyone in the car heard it, too. Scared me half to death. I believed the lie. I received the guilt. Ashamed, I buried the thoughts, didn't think I could ever talk to or come to Jesus (even though occasionally I tried), and didn't tell anyone about it for years. Every now and then when I tried to talk to Jesus, I'd remember the words I heard all over again and feel hopeless and like I was unworthy to approach Him.

Years later, as the Holy Spirit started wooing me, I began to hear a bombardment of the lies that I'd committed the unpardonable sin again. And right behind it came this voice, which I now know was coming from the Holy Spirit and I just knew I was supposed to say it aloud when I heard it. I heard, and confessed 'If there's even a 1% chance that I didn't commit the unpardonable sin I've still got a chance to serve Jesus and go to Heaven. I'm gonna take that chance.' Keep in mind, that in hearing this voice I hadn't even dedicated my life to the Lord yet. But saying it gave me power to believe there was STILL hope for me ... and there was.

I'm leaving you well and whole. That's My parting gift to you. Peace. I don't leave you the way you're used to being left - feeling abandoned, bereft. So don't be upset. Don't be distraught. John 14:27

I used to be in the clubs every night boozing and partying. Bless His heart, the Holy Spirit, tried so hard to get through to me any way He could. When I would be getting dressed and ready to go clubbing, He started telling me 'I love you.' I thought it was satan lying to me trying to get me to serve him. So I'd say back to the voice, 'I rebuke you satan, in the name of Jesus' ('cause I had a Christian upbringing). The Holy Spirit would say, 'I love you, MICHELLE.' I'd say, 'That ain't gonna work, I rebuke you satan, in the name of Jesus.' I just knew in my heart, wounded as it was, that Jesus certainly couldn't love ME. God forgive me, I was rebuking God because the voice was His, not satans. The Holy Spirit followed me right in to the clubs - I would be out on the dance floor, where I was so often, and it would be like there all of a sudden was no one on the floor but me (alone in the crowd). I felt so out of place. It was becoming less and less fun. The Holy Spirit was trying to change my desires, so that the wrong I was doing would no longer be fun for me, so that I'd see the void & need for Him that I was trying to fill with other things.

Looking back I love how the Holy Spirit kept working with me, refusing to give up on me, being patient, till I came to Him. It actually took severe heart and breathing problems to get me to the point of desperation (stupid stubborness) and to call out on my Jesus and ask Him to come into my heart (for the second time - the first time was twenty years earlier - I didn't stay in the Word and went back to my old self after a week).

God will NEVER give up on us. God still loves us even when things go wrong, He's still our Father and He still loves us.

The enemy's tactic - draw us away from God by planting seeds of doubt - RESIST. Don't live under the guilt and fear like I did, any longer ... Christ WILL NOT cast out any who come to Him with a sincere heart.

All that the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out (drive away). John 6:37

Ultimately, rejecting Christ forever is the only way we can commit the unpardonable sin - come to Jesus and repent if you need to.

The Lord knows how to reach each of us.

Father, I pray that You quieten the voice of the enemy. Help us to trust and focus on Your voice alone, give us discernment for it. Remove any guilt that we've committed the unpardonable sin after we confess our sins to You. In Jesus' name, amen.

Don't Look Back - Enough is Enough!

 
  I sought the Lord, and He answered me;
  He delivered me from all my fears.
  Psalm 34:4





Verbal abuse causes you to live in fear - wondering what's gonna happen next, waiting for that pen to drop, walking on egg shells, but God didn't give us a spirit of fear (2 Timothy 1:7). After my abuser wined and dined me and reeled me in, then we moved in together. As soon as that door closed, they knew they had me and verbal abuse came - I was told I was stupid every day, that nobody else would ever want me, that I would never amount to anything, that I could never make it on my own, they would curse and scream at me ... it literally destroyed my soul. Separated me from my family, my friends, all to try keep me dependent on them.

Some say there's no harm in verbal abuse. I disagree. Being barked at and screamed at all day long removes the peace from the home, removes the unity and you get to where you can't make decisions on your own. An abuser is all about control, and God wants us to be led by Him, not some abuser.

We ought to obey God rather than men. Acts 5:2

Physical abuse came later - throwing chairs, raping me and laughing while I cried, beating my head against the wall dozens of times during each episode, beating me repeatedly in the kidneys, telling me how to dress and what to do, would hit me over the head with a cast iron skillet if I didn't put my clothes in the hamper, would take me on suicide rides in the car and try to kill us, would sit me in a corner and throw knives at me, would push me out of the bed after we had had sex because they didn't want to sleep with me, would throw me out of the car and leave me, one time they let me out with some friends of theirs on the side of the road and then told them to gang rape me. They ran me and my mother off the road (we were all in separate cars) and at my mothers once they broke in to try to pull me out of the house.

Know that forced sex, whether you are married or not, is rape. We aren't a toilet or a possession of theirs, we're children of God and His temple.

Once God removed them from my life (I finally defended myself and then hi-tailed it out and never looked back) I didn't see them for another 10 years or so, and that was just in passing. God protected me ... because IT WAS TIME and He said ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. All their threats to kill me and my family were hogwash. Not that it always is, but when He says go or kick em out - do it. My experience has been that eventually the Lord removes one or the other cause He doesn't want to see us suffer. He says in His Word that He'll only allow the innocent to be taken advantage of for so long. Anyway, as you can imagine, I don't have a lot of sympathy for abusers, verbal or anything else. FYI - 9 out of 10 verbal leads to physical.

But in that coming day, no weapon turned against you will succeed. You will silence every voice raised up to accuse you. These benefits are enjoyed by the servants of the Lord; their vindication will come from Me. I, the Lord, have spoken. Isaiah 54:17

Sad to say, so many people (including some ministers) say that we should stay with our abusers, try to make it work, win them over with love, and pray for them. Oh, please. Let those people advising that try living in an abusive situation like getting their face bashed in or demeaning them all day long and then see if they counsel, 'just pray'. Without God, an abuser will NEVER change. No matter how many times they tell you they're sorry or that they'll change or buy you things, it just ain't happening without God. Get out people. Set aside money, prepare a 'to go' bag with important papers, find a 'safe house' and ... get out. Let God fix them, while you're safe somewhere else. When you get out, don't look back or reminisce about the handful of good times ya'll may've had. One hit in the whole time ya'll were together is enough reason to never go back. Cut them soul ties.

Trust God, He has your best interests at heart.

You don't have to be afraid anymore, you'll find out the truth and it'll set you free.

Prayer: Father, I plead the Blood of Jesus Christ over us. Protect us. Lead us. Guide us. Tell us what to do and show us which way to go. Give us a way out. Help us not to look back or go back. Heal our hearts. Love on us. Fill the voids. In Jesus' name I pray, amen.

Psalm 143

1 Hear my prayer, O Lord; listen to my plea! Answer me because

you are faithful and righteous.

2 Don’t put your servant on trial, for no one is innocent before you.

3 My enemy has chased me. He has knocked me to the ground and forces me to live in

 darkness like those in the grave.

4 I am losing all hope; I am paralyzed with fear.

5 I remember the days of old. I ponder all your great works and

think about what you have done.

6 I lift my hands to you in prayer. I thirst for you as parched land thirsts for rain.

7 Come quickly, Lord, and answer me, for my depression deepens.

Don’t turn away from me, or I will die.

8 Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you.

Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.

9 Rescue me from my enemies, Lord; I run to you to hide me.

10 Teach me to do your will, for you are my God.

May your gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing.

11 For the glory of your name, O Lord, preserve my life.

Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress.

12 In your unfailing love, silence all my enemies and destroy all my foes,

for I am your servant.

See also

Step Away ... from that Stale Cracker!

God HATES Abuse - So Stop Being a Martyr & Let Go

 

__________________________________

The National Domestic  Violence Hotline

1 (800) 799-SAFE (7233) or 1 (800) 787-3224 (TTY)

Anonymous & Confidential Help 24/7

http://www.thehotline.org/

God HATES Abuse - So Stop Being a Martyr & Let Go

For the Lord, the God of Israel, says: I hate divorce and him who covers his garment [his wife] with violence. Therefore keep a watch upon your spirit [that it may be controlled by My Spirit], that you deal not treacherously and faithlessly [with your marriage mate]. Malachi 2:16
Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly. Colossians 3:19




You've probably heard more times than you've wanted to that God hates divorce. But did you know that God ALSO hates abuse? Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19) and we are to take care of and protect them. The Word also says to guard our heart with all diligence (Proverbs 4:23).

The Lord has delivered me from many abusive relationships, including the last one which was a verbal, mental, emotional, physical & sexual abusive relationship that lasted 10 yrs. - He can do it for you, too. I always felt like when I had chairs or knives or fists or hateful words thrown at me that when I called on Jesus He heard me but didn't do anything - but He did - I'm still here. The enemy and all my abusers have lost their power over me because of Christ's love for me and His Blood that covers me. If you're still around, you're a fighter and a survivor, too.

We are to be controlled and led by the Holy Spirit, not man. We should never submit to man to the point of sin (whether or not they are our husband, parent, or leader). It's better to obey God rather than man (Acts 5:29). Sad to say, so often out of fear or people pleasing (not wanting to offend), we obey man. Be obedient to the voice of the Lord and instead of being afraid of repercussions or retaliation, trust God for the outcome. Go to God for wisdom and the final say so regarding your relationships - not your friends. Friends can listen, support and advise but don't know what's best for you - only God does.

Without a radical moving and healing from God, an abuser will NEVER EVER change - even if they cry, beg or give gifts - DON'T fall for the lies. Men who abuse women are so chicken and so weak and what happened in their past is NO excuse or reason to do it. They think it makes them feel like a man and they need a mother figure to slave for them that they can control. They also want to have their own personal 'sex slave'. Abusers gain control through brainwashing and fear tactics (like I'll kill you or your family, you can't make it without me, nobody else would want you, or you don't have any money). That and the involvement of children is why some choose to stay anyway.

If someone yells at you, controls you, hits you and separates you from friends and family - you're being abused - pray for a way out and get out. Respect yourself and Christ in you enough to not allow others to abuse and belittle you. Don't allow others to take advantage of and mistreat you because of their position and power. 1 Corinthians 6:14 says not to be unequally yoked. God HATES abuse and DOESN'T want you to live in an abusive situation. You ARE NOT your abuser's savior. You can't fix them, change them, or save them. Jesus should be your Lord (there's only 1 God, 1 Lord, 1 Savior), not a man. 1 Corinthians 7:16 says, 'Wife, how can you be sure of converting and saving your husband? Husband, how can you be sure of converting and saving your wife?' DON'T be deceived into thinking you have to stay with your abuser to keep them from suicide, it's not your responsibility. DON'T worry about 'what ifs'. DON'T stay for the children, the abuser will probably abuse them whether you're there or not. Take you and them to a safe house. (SafeHouseCenter.org 24/7 Helpline: (734) 995-5444). Pray and let God do the work.

Our worth is found in God, not in how people treat us. DON'T define yourself by how you are being treated by an abuser. You ARE NOT a punching bag. You ARE a child of the Most High God. You ARE special in God's sight. You ARE valuable. You ARE loved. You ARE accepted.

God has a GOOD plan for our lives. The Word says in Jeremiah 29:11 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.' Allow Christ's unfailing love to sustain you. You CAN live without your abuser. You CAN have friends that aren't tied to your abuser. You ARE NOT crazy, stupid, or unwanted. You CAN make it on your own - dependent on GOD. You WILL and DO amount to something. You CAN make good decisions on your own - with God's help. You ARE strong enough - God gives you the strength. God DOES hear your cries for help.

It should also be noted that it's a misdemeanor to know that a crime (like abuse) is being committed and not report it. It's a felony to commit abuse - whether they are your spouse or not. It's a felony to commit rape - whether they are your spouse or not. Be a listening ear to those in crisis situations, they don't need your judgment.

Being abused? GET OUT and call 911 - and DON'T let fear and threats talk you out of pressing charges. We won't think less of you, instead we'll be proud of you. If you're being abused, get out and don't look back.

Prayer: Father, I pray that You stop the cycle of abuse across this land. We curse ungodly soul ties in our lives and pray for deliverance from abuse and help us not to return to toxic relationships once we've been delivered. Help us to treat each other with love and respect. Help those of us being abused to get help. Protect us from further harm, Lord. Heal our hearts, minister to those places where we have withdrawn and retreated to in order to protect ourselves. Love on us. Help us to put down the old ways of thinking and doing and begin to trust You enough to do a new thing in us. We will press through. In Jesus' name, Amen.

 
Helpful Scripture

I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.] John 16:33
If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Romans 8:31
Greater is Jesus in us than he that is in the world. 1 John 4:4God will redeem them from oppression and violence, for their lives are precious to Him. Ps 72:14
When you lie down, you will not be afraid; yes you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet. Proverbs 3:24
NO weapon trying to form against us is gonna prosper (Isaiah 54:17).
JESUS is our Husband; He removes our shame: Is 54 http://bit.ly/gdamZG

Helpful Numbers & Websites

If you have been or are being abused now, GET HELP NOW - call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (http://www.thehotline.org) 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
Signs of Abusive Men http://eshanya.webs.com/signsofabusivemen.htm
Male Victims of Domestic Abuse http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/malevictims.shtml
Power & Control Tactics Used in Same-Sex Relationships http://bit.ly/l6n4OR
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence - 'Safety Plan' http://bit.ly/a3LWvg
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence - 'Protecting Your Identity' http://bit.ly/dD6a7h National Coalition Against Domestic Violence - 'Internet Safety' http://bit.ly/aVhr3X

See related post: Step Away ... from that Stale Cracker! http://bit.ly/ihCXye

Do You Hate Yourself?

If we don't forgive - God does this: Matthew 6:14,15 - For if you forgive people their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses.

If we don't forgive - the enemy does this: 2 Corinthians 2:10,11 - If you forgive someone, I will also forgive them. For if indeed I have forgiven anything, I have forgiven that one for your sakes in the presence of Christ, lest Satan should take advantage of us; for we know very well what his plans are.

We are commanded in the Word to love one another, but I ask you, do you love yourself, or do you hate yourself?

When I first got saved, the Lord brought me through deliverance of many things. When He started walking me through forgiveness, I heard a sermon on it. Like I try to do with all sermons, I wanted to apply it to myself. So I asked the Lord who I needed to forgive.

I wasn't expecting the answer I got, 'yourself'. Ok. Had never even heard of that before. So many don't know that we need to forgive ourselves. But as the Holy Spirit started ministering to me, I realized that I hated myself. So how in the world could I forgive myself? I had hated myself so much and what I had become that I didn't even clean the mirrors in my house, for I couldn't stand to look at myself. I sure couldn't look in my eyes, 'cause they are the windows to the soul. And it just wasn't very pretty what I'd see.

After the Lord revealed to me that I needed to forgive myself, I reluctantly chose to, by an act of my free will (not my feelings, because I didn't want to) to forgive myself. The Lord then led me to stand in His Presence for a minute to actually receive that forgiveness. I felt such a weight lift from off my shoulders, I couldn't believe it. Coming to Him and asking for forgiveness set me free. Period.

All these years I've subconsciously been trying to punish myself by hating myself and holding on to the guilt. I was trying to make up for the work that Jesus had already done at the Cross for me. That work was enough, Jesus didn't need my help. Jesus became the guilt offering for me, so I don't have to carry around all that guilt and condemnation for all my sins and wrong choices that I've made in life. Since Jesus did all the work for me at the Cross, who am I to say I can't forgive myself?

The Word actually says that we are loosed to the tormentors when we don't forgive (see Matthew 18:21-35). I've felt that torment and at times through my spritual eyes could see it. It's scary. And the enemy has plans to use us not forgiving ourselves to cause us harm and all sorts of pain and anguish. Some cut themselves. Some commit suicide. Some abuse others. All trying to relieve the feelings of torment from within.

We even wear masks to make us look different to people, thus more acceptable. Sometimes we wear too much makeup, or hang our hair over our eyes, or pretend to be something that we're not, all because we're hoping that people don't see what we believe to be the ugly inside if they could really see us/knew us.

We forgive others every day. Can we not do the same for ourselves? Isn't it time we forgive ourselves, and let ourselves off the hook? For whom the Son sets free, is free indeed!

Prayer: Help us, Lord to see ourselves as You see us. We choose to lay down our anger, bitterness, resentment, self-hatred, guilt, condemnation, and shame for ourselves and wear the robe of righteousness that you have provided for us when we give our life to You. We choose to forgive ourselves. I love You, Lord. And thank You for helping me to be able to face myself, live with myself, and love myself in a healthy way, 'cause it's been a long time coming. For once in my life, I want to live.