Bad Bad Boy, Whatcha Gonna Do

Those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in bondage again to fear; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by Him we cry, 'Abba, Father.' The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs - heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ. Romans 8:14-17

Why do beautiful and precious women think they have to settle for rough, ugly and/or controlling guys that treat them bad? And if they're good looking but treat you bad, that makes them ugly, too. Choosing a bad boy usually comes with a lifetime of regrets. A bad boy and his actions ARE NOT attractive nor exciting. They are destructive. Don't be seduced into the web of the enemy, thinking you have to settle for less than what you want from a partner. Ladies, you're worth SO MUCH MORE than that. RESPECT yourself.

And oh my, PLEASE don't be with a creep just to get out of the house or to punish your parents/family. It’s not worth it to get sucked into a life of hell on earth with the wrong person just to fit in, or get out, or to have a ride, or get back at people. Trust me, you WILL NOT have it easier once you get out. As a matter of fact, it will be harder because you not only have been separated from your family and support system, but are now responsible for running a house, getting and holding a job, and catering to every whim of a man who probably never loved you in the first place and who will treat you horribly despite you doing everything in your power the right way.

There are many men who are on the prowl, looking for a nice, vulnerable woman to take advantage of. They can tell when you are insecure with who you are and who will probably put up with their actions ... one who will do anything for them, despite how they are treated. Someone with low self-esteem is very attractive to them. These guys are usually sweet talkers in the beginning to lure you in and once you’ve formed an attachment to them, usually by sharing intimate things in your life (see more about soul ties here Step Away ... from that Stale Cracker) then they start abusing you, telling you who you can and cannot see and possibly hitting you. They'll flirt with others but tell you that you can't, not call before coming over, lie, hit on your friends in front of you, etc. These are UNACCEPTABLE actions ladies.

You ARE NOT responsible for babysitting men, for being their mother, for being their slave and/or sex slave, or to rescue them from life or themselves. These 'boys' need to grow up and be a man. Learn how to treat a woman right. Learn how to take care of themselves. Learn how to live within the letter of the laws of God and of man. Instead of rebelling against God and running from Him and anything else that's good and right. Bad boys DO NOT really have confidence, and ARE NOT exciting, they are really insecure and that's why they hurry to attach to those who are vulnerable, ones that they hope will fill the void and make them stop being afraid, i.e. another mommy. They only get more angry though, because it doesn't work. Deep down they are broken little boys who need to control and bed women to try to feel better about themselves. That broken boy CAN NOT be rescued or fixed by you. HE WON'T change as long as he's clinging on to you. Only Jesus and hard work on the part of the boy/man can fix them. You ARE NOT anyone's savior. Let them change their own diapers and hold his own pacifier. Try working on yourself instead. A better you will automatically attract a better him.

The better you feel about yourself, the less you will allow people in your life that treat you wrong. Low self-esteem will cause us to settle with far less than God's best. If a woman feels good about herself, she chooses a mate who communicates both verbally and non-verbally to her that she is valued and respected. She won't allow this other person to undermine her positive self-worth. She believes in her ability to participate in a healthy, reciprocal relationship. If she doesn't feel good about herself, she chooses someone who reinforces her negative self-beliefs.

These men are just distractions sent by the enemy to try to keep God’s will from coming to pass in your life. You're not a doormat, punching bag, a dog or a trophy ... if you belong to Jesus, you are a child of God. There's NEVER a good reason to put up with abuse. HIT THE DOOR running if you're not treated with love and respect. REGARDLESS of how good looking or hot he may be in your eyes. Your dreamboat is dangerous. Do it NOW before it goes any further.

God has called us to live in peace. 1 Corinthians 7:15

Hold your head high, guard your heart and wait for GOD'S best for you.

Father, I pray that You place a hedge of protection around us and our hearts, that we not get caught up in the traps of the enemy. Choose a partner for us IF You have one and help us to wait on You. If we are to be single to serve You wholeheartedly, help us to be and stay devoted to You. If there are any that have already been trapped by the enemy's lies and webs, release them from that bondage. Give them boldness to get away and help them to stay away. In the name of Jesus, amen.

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If you are being abused GET HELP NOW call

National Domestic Violence Hotline

1-800-799-SAFE

http://www.thehotline.org
or
National Dating Abuse Hotline
1-866-331-9474
http://www.loveisrespect.org
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see also:  Keep it Zipped            Do You Hate Yourself?            Don't Look Back (my story)

Step Away ... from that Stale Cracker!

John 8:36 - If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.






When we become involved with someone, we form ties, called soul ties, with them. A soul tie is a tie or a bond between two people in the realm of the soul, which is the mind, will and emotions. There can be good soul ties - that are healthy, and bad soul ties - which can be very destructive.

We have a soul tie with everyone we've slept with and those in close non-sexual proximity, too.

Godly soul ties are those in which we lift up and encourage each other and not put down, abuse, take advantage of, or control each other. These are healthy relationships.

And then there's the ungodly soul ties. Maybe you got involved with a person that abused you, controlled you, kept you from your family and friends. Or maybe you were molested/raped or had some other type of bad experience with someone.

Maybe you've split up with a person that wasn't abusive, maybe they were good and you messed up. Or you both mutually decided to go your separate ways or divorce. Or maybe they passed away.

If you have ungodly soul ties in your life, you need to break them now. For those who have been raped - the soul ties need to be broken now. For every person you've ever sleep with, if you're not in a godly relationship with them right now, it needs to be broken. No need to hold on to that person or persons any more. It's safe to let them go.

For bad soul ties, if God's delivered you from a relationship with someone, don't lower yourself by driving by their house to see who the new 'miss thang' is in their driveway now. You're not just belittling yourself, you might be keeping soul ties attached that way, that you need to be cutting and leaving severed.

Keep it real ... you'll be fine without that person that hurt you. No need to reminess or hope for the way it used to be. If God's removed someone from your life, let that stale cracker go! Remembering those few little good things about the relationship or feeding thoughts that 'it really wasn't all that bad' or longings for them can open a door the Lord probably wants to remain closed. And it can unintentionally cause you to go running back. Don't do it!

Quit dredging up that old stuff. Step away from that stale cracker. God's got something new for you, but you have to let go of that old thing first. Were they really all that great, anyway? Were they ... not working, unattentive, abusive, rude, demeaning ... PLEASE, PEOPLE ... don't go back to that! Believe better of yourself than that. If you keep going back, you're basically abusing yourself just as much as they were.

Seemingly innocent conversations, sharing intimate vulnerable details and becoming emotionally dependent on a person and always thinking about them and thinking that you can't live without them are all signs that you need to step back and re-evaluate your relationship with that particular person.

Be careful who you hang around and be careful who you share your heart with.

Proverbs 4:23 - Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Prayer: Father, in the name of Jesus we pray that by way of Your Holy Spirit You bring to our remembrance anyone that we need to break a soul tie with. We call out each name to You, Lord and we break that soul tie with _________ in the name of Jesus. We pray that the tie stays severed and that we don't try to go back to try to reattach them. We believe in You, Lord and trust You and Your judgement as far as who to let into our hearts and lives and who not to. Thank You, Lord for protecting us and keeping us from getting involved to deep with those You don't want us to. In Jesus' name, Amen.